when i was 6 years old, i went through a traumatic experience, one no 6 year old, or anyone in fact, should ever go through, but it shaped who i am today. i’m not entirely ready to share the events but i will tell you about my journey the past years.
ever since i was little i would be anxious about big things, an exam or moving away from home. but about 3 years ago even the smallest things seemed so difficult, brushing my hair, cleaning my room, having a shower. something wasn’t right.
i dropped out of school at the start of secondary and isolated myself up until i was around 14. i didn’t go out anywhere, socialise with others my own age, i couldn’t bare the thought of it. i didn’t mind not going to school but it was when i did start school things got worse for me.
i descended down into a spiral of depression, anxiety and eventually started to have suicidal feelings. i couldn’t get the trauma out of my head and couldn’t see a way to get over it and unfortunately things got so bad i took attempts to end my life.
after my last unsuccessful attempt, back in August 2020, i eventually was referred to a psychiatrist. they gave me the information for mind and to read up on how i could help myself in the mean time, while waiting to be seen.
i was diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and dissociation disorder. having a diagnosis helped me and reading the information on mind i knew that some of them symptoms i had. obviously i didn’t want to self diagnose so i waited and the psychiatrist officially diagnosed me.
i started on medication and had regular therapy and eventually the therapy came to end, however i still am taking the medication and am being reviewed every few weeks by the psychiatrist, but the help is there if i need it.
my family were a great help and although it was a stressful time we got through it. my mum is probably the strongest woman i know and i know that she would be so proud of me for doing this walk.
Now, i’m doing well academically and although i do have some downfalls and relapses and have thoughts every now and then i’m officially 7 months clean from self harm!
when i felt like i couldn’t get over my trauma mind helped me. having the right information was so important and helped to give me hope in getting on a better, healthier path and control.
i’m doing this walk to show raise money for mind, if you’re reading this, believe you can get on the right path too. believe in yourself, have hope, and take a look at minds website. i will be walking this across the month of May. that gives us all 23 days to raise money and spread awareness !!